My wife was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual Soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only The t-shirt that she normally slept in.
As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said aggressively, “You’ve got to make love to me this very moment!”
My eyes lit up and I thought, “I am either still dreaming or this is going to be my lucky day!”
Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table.
Afterwards she said, “Thanks,” and returned to the stove, her T-shirt still around her neck.
Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked, “What was that all about?”
“The egg timer’s broken."
Joke: These Newlyweds Can't Get Enough
Homer and Darlene are countryside newlyweds. They can't get enough of each other, but their nooner is taking too long. The town doctor proposes a useful solution...
Joke: Putting Your Private Part Right Is Gonna Cost
When a doctor is tasked with fixing a rabbi's mangled manhood, he explains that there's a variation in price depending on the size...
This Joke Starts With a Huge Family Waiting For a Bus
A blind man vies for a seat on a bus with a family with nine children. Inevitably, he and the husband do not make it on due to overcrowding. An argument ensues.
Joke: Wedding Decisions
A bride and a groom are with a pastor finalizing details for their wedding day. The pastor asks them whether they want a traditional or contemporary wedding...
Joke: The Panty Rule
A newlywed couple are about to consummate their wedding night when the husband decides to lay down the law. He couldn't predict what would happen next...
15 Funny Pictures of Pets Engaged in Shenanigans
These hilarious entries from the Comedy Pet Photography Awards will have you rolling in laughter.
These Mistranslations are Too Funny Not to Share
Enjoy this hilarious collection of ridiculousy bad translation fails.
Hilarious! Meet the World's Strongest Teenage Girl
If you're looking for something to brighten up your day, then this brilliant prank from the Just For Laughs group is just what you need!
Kidding in the Rain: A Collection of Rainy-Day Pranks!
A hilarious collection of pranks by just for laughs focusing on rainy days.
For a Giant Smile, Check Out These Hilarious Cartoons!
If you love cartoon stripes then you came to the right place. Enjoy this collection of funny cartoons that are sure to make your day funnier and your step lighter.
18 Terrible Sign Designs That Will Have You Bust a Gut
Feeling down? Well, after reading these 18 side-splitting signs, you will no longer have that problem on your hands...
George Carlin Had a Funny Way of Telling the Truth!
Mr George Carlin's legacy will be fondly remembered for many years. There are not many people who can entertain, amuse, and delight by asking a simple question.
This "Senior Prayer" Made Me Laugh My Butt Off!
A hilarious form of prayer by a senior who knows what she's talking about...
Small Town America Has Some RIDICULOUS Laws
It’s hard to believe these dumb laws still exist!
The Funniest Outdoor Signs from This Vet Clinic
The Carroll County Veterinary Clinic grabs people’s attention with its hilarious roadside signs
The Most Outrageously Hilarious Signs You’ll See
You know what time it is? It’s time for some funny signs!
Classic Comedy: The Miracle of Birth!
This sketch puts a very funny light on the process of hospital birth. Thank goodness it isn't like this in real life... or is it?
This Naughty Policeman Prank Is Utterly Hysterical!
This hilarious prank involves a naughty policeman, his enraged wife and a few innocent bystanders. What's for certain is that it's downright hysterical!
These Coffee Shop Customers Couldn't Believe Their Eyes...
This gag is going to make you wonder: Why aren't they gagging??
19 Photos Proving That Sleeping Pets Is the Funniest Thing
Have you ever caught your pet in an awkward sleeping position? If so, you know these can be really hilarious!
These Adorably Cute & Funny Comic Strips Are So Relatable!
Fowl Language Comics was created by Brian Gordon, who says he draws much inspiration from his struggles as a parent. Take a look at his hilarious illustrations!
Hilarious! Some Animals Cannot Pose Well in Photos
Here are some majestic and graceful animals, captured in less than fluttering moments.
Hilarious: Only in Dubai...
Dubai is a unique country, and offers some sights you'll probably never seen anywhere else in the world...
Excuse Me, But Are These Signs for REAL?!?
Who comes up with these hilarious ideas and useless ideas for signs?
These Funny Signs Excel At Stating the Obvious...
Some signs that you come across in life literally leave you scratching your head. Their messages are so obvious that they beggar belief. Take a look.
Hilarious: When It's Just Not Your Day...
These photos show spectacularly awful things that can happen to anyone. Let’s hope there was someone to give them a big hug afterwards.
Funny! When Cake Decorators Take Instructions Literally
What would your reaction be if you had to receive one of these hilarious cakes?
Hilarious: This Week's Funniest Cartoons!
Our selection for this week's hilarious comics, there's a lot to smile and giggle about on this page. So if you need a moment to smile, or indeed some solid minutes - we've got you covered.
20 Weird and Terrifically Hilarious Signs…
These hilariously bizarre signs are just what we needed today.
The Ridiculous Shenanigans of Laurel and Hardy
Laurel and Hardy never fail to make us laugh.
Hilarious: These Funny Restaurant Signs Cracked People Up
Whenever people drove by these fast food joints, they were stopped in their tracks by their hilarious signs. Take a look.
When it Comes to Comedy, Twins Have an Unfair Advantage...
Just for Laughs is at it again, this time with the best twin pranks around.
This Has Got to be the World's Funniest Orchestra!
This orchestra not only provides you with great music, but great laughs as well.
Hilarious: If You Love English You'll Love These Puns!
We’ve collected 14 side-splitting jokes and puns that highlight common grammatical mistakes, contain clever twists on words, and more!
Not the Greatest Boy Scout - Hilarious!
A silly but hilarious prank the whole family will enjoy.
Classic Comedy: The Grammar Nazi
This comedy sketch begins with a standard business meeting, but the boss has a real problem with people's language...
I Can't Stop Laughing at These Funny Husbands
Check out these 12 examples of husbands and boyfriends being absolutely hilarious.
WATCH: 10 Funny Xmas Editions of 'Simon's Cat' All in One!
These hilarious cartoons from Simon's cat serve to remind us not to forget something really important: It's Christmas for our cats too!
These Photos Are so Ironic You'll Howl with Laughter!
The pictures you're about to see are so permeated with irony that they are scarcely believable. Here are 29 of the most ironic pictures you'll ever see.
Hilarious: These Cat Comics are Just What I Needed...
These hilarious one-panel comics perfectly illustrate the life of cats.