Car puns are really tiring
Why is it so expensive to run a submarine?
It's the depth charges.
What did the Wife say to the Husband?
You are exhausting!
What is a car’s favourite band?
Van Halen.
What is a car’s favourite sport?
Soc-car.
Why are cars so cheeky?
Because they are fuel of it.
A man is wanted for stealing tires off of cop cars.
Police are working tirelessly to catch him.
What is the preferred shampoo brand of truck drivers?
Lorry-el
A truck carrying Lego got into an accident on the motorway. No one knows what happened; the authorities are still trying to piece everything together.
What color are military submarines?
Deep navy
What superhero takes public transportation to get around? Bus Lightyear.
Why did the submarine driver lose his job
Old, racist tweets resurfaced
Why did the bicycle fall over?
Because it was too tired..
How do you impregnate a submarine?
Fill it with seamen.
‪My kid’s toy submarine was having trouble staying under water...‬
‪I hope this will not surface again‬
How to cars convince you?
By telling you that ‘you Audi-believe it.’
The bus driver was so friendly and nice, it was a 'joy ride'!
Milk trucks always drive so fast, don’t they? You blink and they’re already pasteurize.
A silent man walked into a bicycle shop...
He picked up a wheel and spoke.
I saw a sign on the bus the other day.
It said "please give this seat to the elderly."
So I ripped it out and took it home for my grandad
What is a car’s favourite fashion accessory?
A clutch bag.
What happens when a frogs car breaks down?
It has to be toad away.
I once had my identity stolen by a cement truck driver. It took me ages to track him down, but now I have concrete evidence.
I’ve always been a trucker, but recently I applied for a job at Microsoft. I’ve heard they’re always looking for more drivers.
I tried to make a wooden submarine.
It didn't go down so well.
A truck carrying ladders crashed on the road. The cargo has spilled over, but police are taking steps to clear the area.
Authorities have been trying to figure out how the Worcestershire sauce truck spilled...
But it's hard to say...
I was selling my bike and an interested buyer asked what’s lowest I’d go.
"About 3 mph," I said, "otherwise I’d tip over."
Why did the bus driver take a long break? He needed a wheel-y good rest!
I saw a lady riding a camel and being pulled by a truck...
It was a camel tow
Why was the bus musician so excited? He just got a 'ride-ing' ovation!
I told my boyfriend I'd missed the bus.
He asked me what I was trying to hit it with.
How is the submarine doing at school?
It's below c-level
I have to pay for a bus ticket?
I guess it's only fare
A truck full of christmas trees have been stolen.
Police admit they are stumped.
Mum said I would never be able to make a bicycle out of spaghetti
Well I did, and you should’ve seen her face when I rode pasta
What did the girl say before making a big decision?
‘Do not pressure me.’
What happened when the cargo ship full of books sank?
It caused a title wave!
Ship Captain: Guys, I need help. I don’t remember how to write 2 in Roman numerals.
Crew: I I Captain.
My partner has been having nightmares that he’s a truck. He always wakes up tyred and exhaust-ed.
In Mexico, truck drivers always keep a wheel of cheese in their cabs. Apparently this is in queso emergencies.
How did cars protect themselves during the medieval age?
They would dig an M.O.T. around them.
There are more planes under the oceans than there are submarines up in the skies. Let that sink in...
How do you know a car is a good price?
If it is a Ford-able.
I got arrested because I left my car at the bar and took the bus home.
It turned out I was in no condition to drive that either.
What are police cars made of?
Copper
Have you heard about Amazon’s plan to make intercontinental shipments using electric submarine drones?
They’re projecting a large increase in e-fish-in-sea.
How do eels travel across the seafloor? By Octo-bus.
Why did the bus driver quit his job? It was driving him mad.
As I put the car in reverse, I thought to myself:
"This really takes me back".