Why did the cosmonaut take his dog to the vet?
He came down with a stellar case of lunar tics.
Why did the cow go right up to the spaceship? To see the Mooooooooooon.
Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket for bonfire night.
He's over the moon!He's over the moon!
Whats the first day of the week called in outer space?
Moonday.
How will you make a baby astronaut fall asleep peacefully? Rock-et.
What do you think walking on the moon is like?
Not very impactful.
Why don't aliens get hungry after being blasted into space?
Because they've just had a big launch.
Do you know what is the favorite key of the astronauts?
The Spacebar.
What do you call an alien spaceship that's leaking water?
A crying saucer.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Wanna know a way for werewolves to howl other than the full moon?
Make them stub their toe.
What is a lightyear?
The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
What will you do if you come across a green alien? I’ll simply wait until it’s ripe.
Did you know milk is the fastest liquid on the planet?
It's pasteurized before you see it.
What does Earth get on Earth day ?
A birthday quake !
How does a quarter moon always feel?
Crestfallen.
What kind of light goes around the earth? A Satel-lite.
What kind of tropical fruit wants to visit the moon?
A Coco-naut
What if the earth was both round and flat?
Would it be called cylindearth?
He knew literally everything about the constellations. Some might even say that his knowledge of the night sky was astronomical.
What’s the suns favorite clothes brand?
Kelvin Klein.
Why don't pets make good astronauts?
They're afraid of the spay station
What do you call the Earth when it is quaking?
Shakesphere.
Scientists permit us to see the sun in different light.
Why didnt the moon go outside?
Because it was waning.
What did Mars tell to Saturn? Give me a ring sometime!
"Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?"
"No sun."
I've finally started to believe that Pluto is not really a planet...
Especially when I saw him in a cartoon.
Which candy do astronauts like? Marsbar.
Why do all kids want to be an astronaut?
Because there is no pressure.
Which channels do the asteroids like to watch? The comet-y channel.
An astronaut who normally fails on a weightlessness experiment, might surely be aware of the gravity of the situation.
What all kinds of stars wear the sunglasses? The movie stars.
Why does the earth appreciate the moon so much?
It keeps the oceans tidy.
I debated a flat earther once. He stormed off saying he’d walk to the edge of the Earth to prove me wrong.
He’ll come around eventually.
Have you heard the one about the spaceship that came to Earth?
Never mind its over your head.
Becoming a space pilot is not easy. It requires a good altitude.
Living on Earth might be expensive. But we surely get a free trip around the sun every year!
How do planets staying busy during hunting season?
By shooting stars.
What did the astronaut cook for lunch? An unidentifiable frying object.
Where do the astronauts park their vehicles? At the parking meteors.
When astronauts die, the local papers run an orbituary.
My dads astronaut friend ate pizza in space
He said it was out of this world.
How does one astronaut on the moon tell another astronaut that he is sorry?
He apollo-gises.
What do you call a person really crazy about the moon
A lunatic.
What will a space turkey say to another one? Hubble Hubble.
How will you save yourself if you come across an aggressive alien? Give him some space.
How does a Man cut his hair on the moon? Eclipse it.
The sun replies: I hurt everyone when they come close to me.
Why did the police arrest the star? That’s becuase it was a shooting star.