What’s the difference between a dog and a gator?
A dog’s bark is worse than its bite.
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
What do you call an alligator that makes others fight?
An instigator.
Why are alligators long and green?
Because if they were small and red, they would be tomatoes.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
Did you hear about the constipated crocodile?
It was a crockashit.
The weather's getting colder, I really fancy some hot croc-o-late.
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
When alligators need energy, they just slug down some gator-ade.
Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
Did you here about the croc with a serious drug addiction?
It was a crackodile.
Some people like to play croc-quet.
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
An alley-gator!
Did you hear about the croc and rooster that had a kid together?
It was a crocadoodledoo.
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
What is the most effective way to cook a crocodile?
In a croc pot.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
What do alligators call human children?
Appetizers.
Let's play some scrabble, I just need to get the croc-a-tiles.
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
What kind of croc hangs out in back passages around town?
An Alley-gator.
What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
A congregator.
I like you, you croc my world.
That alligator took great photos, he was a bit of a snapper.
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
Why don't alligators like fast food?
Because it is difficult to catch.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gator.
Why are alligator comedians so funny?
Their wit is as razor sharp as their teeth!
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
I told the other alligator to stay outside, he cai-man anyway.
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
Whichever gator stole all the food, we'll catch the crook-a-dile.